My first post for November! And it's a rant! Hooray!
I went to the local tavern for lunch with my sister today. In the corner was a small man who looked a little like Colonel Sanders, next to him was an empty table. I glanced at him as I walked over to the cash machine thinking nothing more of him until he came running up to say "If you want my table I'll move for you. I'm truly just sitting there" I told him that he didn't have to worry as there were plenty of tables around but he insisted and returned to his table and grinned at everyone.
We went and ordered and decided to sit at the free table that was next to him, however he decided that he would be true to his word and got up and said, "I'll leave you to alone to get up to romance" and then winked. Now I'm one of those guys that looks enough like his sister to see that we're related, so he was either giving me the green light for incest or is a presumptuous old f#%kwit, I like to think the latter of the two.
Apart from being presumptuous, he was the kind of guy that just wandered up and spoke to everyone, but not because he knew them. It was because he was a social burden. As we left, he waved and thanked us for coming like he owned the place when in fact he was just a slightly drunk, 70 year old man, dressed in a straw hat and bow tie, who looked like Colonel Sanders, who thought I was romancing my sister, with no immediate social circle, who has to drink on a Monday morning to get through the week. I hate him.
That is why that man is the presumptuous old man who ruined lunch.
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