Thursday, May 7, 2009

Tom the Unprotected Lothario.

On Sunday 60 Minutes had an unprotected sex special. It was meant to be hard hitting but they started losing credibility when they chose a chick who had a bigger jaw than Bianca Dye to hand out condoms and advice.

Their next fatal error was handing out lube. Now if a reasonably good looking 16-18 year old surfie dude has a problem getting his 16-18 year old girlfriend wet, he probably shouldn't be having unprotected sex and just stick to wanking.

The final straw was having this guy on their "unprotected sex panel"



It's Tom the Unprotected Lothario. He looks like a cross between Dick Dastardly, Garfield, Pepe Le Pew and a fuckwit. He said ridiculous things as well like "Don't judge me but I wouldn't tell a one night stand if I had an STD" Don't worry about that Tom, we started judging you the second you appeared on TV with those "Fuck Me Eyes" and your questionable choices in facial hair grooming.

The inclusion of Tom derailed the show. The question no longer was why are our children having unprotected teen sex but why are our children having unprotected teen sex with this guy? The thought of him stuffing parts makes me physically ill and 60 Minutes should be held accountable for bringing such mental imagery into our homes. Hopefully such a shambolic appearance on National TV will prove to be all the protection Australia needs from beret wearing Ranga's who will not be exempt from judgement.

In a bonus round of credibility detraction, they had an expert who said "Half of all people having sex are on drugs" To borrow on a theme, the next time you're coupled up and you're not pilling of your nut or grinding your jaw into dust, it means your partner is and that's a sad indictment on you because the only way you can pull a root is to find someone who is munted. The message is take drugs and make your partner the one with no standards. It seems to work for Tom.
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1 comment:

JW said...

When I saw it I instantly thought Tom looked like a Guess Who character. I loved that game. My favourite question to ask was "does the person look like a child molestor?" It instantly wiped out half of them.

May 8, 2009 at 10:28 AM

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