I like making up simple lies that are completely implausible. Stuff like I collaborated with D12 on Purple Pills, or I was the artistic inspiration for the character of Jafar in Aladin.
What lies do you enjoy?
Sunday, July 5, 2009
iPhone song update.
I started sorting through the music in our library to put together a new playlist for my iPhone at about 6pm and finished about half an hour ago at 9:00pm. Before that I just had a special mix of songs of 07 and the Vice City soundtrack. It took me about a year to get sick of that playlist cos there is only so many times you can listen to the Human League I guess.
Anyways, out of the 5700 odd songs I picked out 677 which is about 1 in 9 so that's a decent representation. It's a mix of stuff that Ris has downloaded and old favourites. Currently, Peaches' Talk to Me is playing from her latest LP "I Feel Cream" Before the sort, I hadn't listened to it. Look at that Cashman, broadening your horizons on a Sunday night.
Speaking of broadened horizons, I was at Christopher's place yesterday and he introduced me to this gem
A reliable source informs me that it was the #4 selling single in the UK during its year of release.
I'm going to go download some Steppin' Out now. Only one person will understand that.
Anyways, out of the 5700 odd songs I picked out 677 which is about 1 in 9 so that's a decent representation. It's a mix of stuff that Ris has downloaded and old favourites. Currently, Peaches' Talk to Me is playing from her latest LP "I Feel Cream" Before the sort, I hadn't listened to it. Look at that Cashman, broadening your horizons on a Sunday night.
Speaking of broadened horizons, I was at Christopher's place yesterday and he introduced me to this gem
A reliable source informs me that it was the #4 selling single in the UK during its year of release.
I'm going to go download some Steppin' Out now. Only one person will understand that.
Michael Jackson's Childhood
What. The. Fuck.
I saw this on one of the countless MJ tribute hours on Music Max. I've never even heard of this song before. It's apparently part of the Free Wily 2 soundtrack and can be found on HIStory. I must've skipped it every time.
The song opens with the refrain "Have you seen my childhood?" Is it just me or is that euphemism for something far more sinister? Why didn't the makers of Free Willy 2 stop and take a second to go "Something's not quite right, I think this dude is crying out for help"
Now no one will see MJ's childhood ever again. How sad.
Thursday, July 2, 2009
Lote continued.
So not much has really happened today except for the ARU and John O’Neill saying “He knows what he’s done and if he doesn’t know we’re not going to tell him” It sounds like a lovers tiff gone wrong really.
“What did I do?”
“If you don’t know by now you’ll never know so I’m not telling”
Wow. That’s really progressive ARU. Grow some balls and try to at least get the public on your side by making the reasons for the sacking transparent, although, he’s probably guilty of something completely trivial like leaving the toilet seat up at ARU HQ or he said that the ARU’s sister in law is a fat slag.
It’s quite funny how the ARU threw $1mil a season at Lote to keep him away from Souths, almost in a bid to spite League from not having their “toy” and when they realised that no-one cared about the signing and that wasting $1mil on a winger was actually a bad idea, they’ve now tried to distance themselves from Lote and transfer the issue and blame on him.
“What did I do?”
“If you don’t know by now you’ll never know so I’m not telling”
Wow. That’s really progressive ARU. Grow some balls and try to at least get the public on your side by making the reasons for the sacking transparent, although, he’s probably guilty of something completely trivial like leaving the toilet seat up at ARU HQ or he said that the ARU’s sister in law is a fat slag.
It’s quite funny how the ARU threw $1mil a season at Lote to keep him away from Souths, almost in a bid to spite League from not having their “toy” and when they realised that no-one cared about the signing and that wasting $1mil on a winger was actually a bad idea, they’ve now tried to distance themselves from Lote and transfer the issue and blame on him.
Wednesday, July 1, 2009
Lote Tuqiri gone
For some reason the ARU has decided to terminate Lote Tuqiri's contract. They've done it effective immediately but won't say why.
Air Lote as we'll affectionately call him, was Australian Union's highest paid player and was contracted until 2012. What happened? Did they just figure out he used to play league or something? He shouldn't feel too bad cos International Dell has picked up and done pretty well over the last 12 months. Lote has been pretty useless recently so it's not unwarranted but the word on the street is it's player behaviour.
I remember when he played against the Roosters in his Debut season back in 2000 or thereabouts. He was so bad. He contested about 3 or 4 bombs and dropped them all. It's been a hell of a ride since then but now it seems it's all over. That said, if he heads back to League, I'm sure a club will pick him up. If not, he'll just go to French Rugby.
Air Lote as we'll affectionately call him, was Australian Union's highest paid player and was contracted until 2012. What happened? Did they just figure out he used to play league or something? He shouldn't feel too bad cos International Dell has picked up and done pretty well over the last 12 months. Lote has been pretty useless recently so it's not unwarranted but the word on the street is it's player behaviour.
I remember when he played against the Roosters in his Debut season back in 2000 or thereabouts. He was so bad. He contested about 3 or 4 bombs and dropped them all. It's been a hell of a ride since then but now it seems it's all over. That said, if he heads back to League, I'm sure a club will pick him up. If not, he'll just go to French Rugby.
Happy July!
Wow. It's July. That means there's only 6 months of this decade left. It also means those crappy EoFYS ads are over and done with. Fuck you Foxtel.
What else is happening?
July 1 is the 182nd day in the year (183rd in leap years) It's Pamela Anderson (42) Debbie Harry (64) Missy Elliot (38) Liv Tyler (32) Princess Di (46 if alive) Dan Ackroyd (57) and Christian II of Denmark (618 if alive) birthday today. A big happy bday y'all!
What else is happening?
July 1 is the 182nd day in the year (183rd in leap years) It's Pamela Anderson (42) Debbie Harry (64) Missy Elliot (38) Liv Tyler (32) Princess Di (46 if alive) Dan Ackroyd (57) and Christian II of Denmark (618 if alive) birthday today. A big happy bday y'all!
Work Experience Girl
We have a work experience girl in the office this week. She's apparently hyper-intelligent and is doing 14 units of study for next years HSC or maybe it's the year after. I didn't find this out first hand, I heard it from others.
This means that she was in Kindergarten when I was doing my HSC which puts my age into perspective in a wild way. It also means that I feel uncomfortable about saying hi to her because I don't wanna seem like that pervy office guy and instead I leave her to her silence in the little corner office.
Be a man and say hi to a 16 year old. Oh that's right, if they're fully formed they're threatening. You make me sick Cashman.
This means that she was in Kindergarten when I was doing my HSC which puts my age into perspective in a wild way. It also means that I feel uncomfortable about saying hi to her because I don't wanna seem like that pervy office guy and instead I leave her to her silence in the little corner office.
Be a man and say hi to a 16 year old. Oh that's right, if they're fully formed they're threatening. You make me sick Cashman.
Eva Longoria
Speaking of retarded sisters, I heard a joke on the bus. These school kids were swapping jokes and one of them says,
"What's Eva Longoria's retarded sister called?"
"Eva Mongoria"
I lied, there was no bus or kids, I wrote that myself but it's fun to blame children isn't it?
"What's Eva Longoria's retarded sister called?"
"Eva Mongoria"
I lied, there was no bus or kids, I wrote that myself but it's fun to blame children isn't it?
Brooke Greenberg and Ebay
Candice sent me this story today.
It's about little Brooke Greenberg and her inability to grow. Here's a photo.
Isn't she adorable? In this photo she's with her 13 year old sister. The family is getting doctors to check Brooke out but I'm not too sure why. If they unlock the secrets to her lack of aging does that mean that they can go ahead and reverse her current state? That's a lot of fuct up growing she has to do which she probably could do without.
My thoughts are that all these doctors would cost money and, unless her family are sick or Brooke is a mad slut, she's still a virgin. Why not cash in and sell her virginity online? She's legal, and sure it'll be classed as prostitution for tax purposes but it's a real money spinner. There's got to be some sick fuck out there who wants to do a baby and this will be an actualisation of their fantasies. Better yet, after it's done, you could arrest them for being a sick fuck and get them off the streets. Everyone's a winner!
The real winner though is brave little Brooke Greenberg. Her eyebrows and impish grin give me hope every day.
It's about little Brooke Greenberg and her inability to grow. Here's a photo.
Isn't she adorable? In this photo she's with her 13 year old sister. The family is getting doctors to check Brooke out but I'm not too sure why. If they unlock the secrets to her lack of aging does that mean that they can go ahead and reverse her current state? That's a lot of fuct up growing she has to do which she probably could do without.
My thoughts are that all these doctors would cost money and, unless her family are sick or Brooke is a mad slut, she's still a virgin. Why not cash in and sell her virginity online? She's legal, and sure it'll be classed as prostitution for tax purposes but it's a real money spinner. There's got to be some sick fuck out there who wants to do a baby and this will be an actualisation of their fantasies. Better yet, after it's done, you could arrest them for being a sick fuck and get them off the streets. Everyone's a winner!
The real winner though is brave little Brooke Greenberg. Her eyebrows and impish grin give me hope every day.
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